Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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