You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
