I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
