if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
