brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
