My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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