Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Naked Twister starts at high noon
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
