I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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