Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
