I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize