It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
