just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
