Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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