You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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