Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
