It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
