Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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