Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
