What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
