we're blogging at a bar
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
