i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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