It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
