just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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