so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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