Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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