Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
