i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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