Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
