Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
whose ass print is on the piano?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Let's get the cat blown out
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
How naked do you want me to be?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
