Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
