We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
