He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
