I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
