My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
