Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
