So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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