His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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