i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize