Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
YAS. BRING CRAB.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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