Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
