Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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