Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize