You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
