i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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