I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
