just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
