you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
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