Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
