How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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