I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
